Have you ever wondered how introverted or extroverted your work style is? This short quiz will help you understand whether your writing personality tends toward introversion or extroversion.
What kind of writing personality do you have? What parts of writing are easy or challenging for you? Share your stories in the comments.
Whether you’re the friend that everyone calls when they have a grammar question or you’re just a big English language geek, you love reading about and talking about language online. When writing mistakes happen online, however, language and grammar can get pretty divisive—quickly. We all have a tendency to chime in, but not all of us are as productive as others. Find out how much of a grammar troll you are in our short, fun quiz.
What kind of writing personality do you have? What parts of writing are easy or challenging for you? Share your stories in the comments.
Difficult people can quickly turn your dream job into a nightmare if you let them. However, your happiness and productivity are worth the fight. Let’s consider the best ways to deal with challenging personalities.
In “Man in the Mirror,” a song recorded by Michael Jackson, the lyrics provide an effective formula for improving your environment: “Take a look at yourself, and then make a change.” Self-examination might reveal that you are overreacting to a situation. For example, perhaps you don’t appreciate a particular coworker who gives harsh criticism. Stop for a moment and consider: what are the person’s motives? Instead of assuming she’s trying to bring you down, why not assume she’s trying to make you the best you can be? Adjusting your attitude can help you to see the bright side of irritating behavior.
The song continues: “It’s gonna feel real good.” Scientific evidence supports the claim. Emotional intelligence includes having empathy and good social skills. In 2013, a study published in Psychological Science found that people with high emotional intelligence made wise decisions. A 2008 study revealed that positive work interactions correlated with good health, a factor associated with few sick days and thus higher productivity. What author William Arthur Ward said was true: “When we seek to discover the best in others, we somehow bring out the best in ourselves.”
You can’t expect anyone to read your mind. Often, problems arise when one person misunderstands the humor or intentions of another. You need to give your colleague the opportunity to make things right.
Approach your colleague and explain why his behavior offends you. Plan your words. Strive for the most palatable way to voice your complaint. You might role-play first with an objective party. Ask a friend to monitor your tone, your words, and your body language. When you speak to the difficult person in real life, carefully choose a time and place. (For instance, avoid addressing issues in the middle of stressful projects.) Find a neutral place (i.e., not your office) where you can discuss the matter privately.
Bill Eddy, President of High Conflict Institute, suggests the following formula: Express regret that you have to address the behavior. Explain how you plan to help the person. Give examples of how you want them to act and how new practices would be beneficial to both parties. Let’s look at an example scenario. Think about your workplace challenge and how you can adapt the script to deal with it.
You: . . ., I’m sorry that I have to bring this up, but the way you . . . makes me feel . . . On my end, I will . . . However, if in the future, you could . . . If you do, the process of . . . will work much more smoothly than it does now.
You approached the employee about how his or her behavior. If there is no change or the situation worsens, what can you do?
Ignore the Bad Behavior
Just like young bullies, difficult adults may seek attention with bad behavior. To show them that you are unaffected, you can deflect insults by laughing along with their jokes or making a neutral retort as if you didn’t understand their rude intentions. Then, change the subject. Once they fail to get the attention they crave from you, they may move on to a new target.
Nasty colleague: I heard Benjamin took vacation leave because he was embarrassed about losing the Denman account.
You: The beach is a restful environment. I can’t wait for my next vacation.
Avoid the Person
If it’s possible without damaging your ability to work, limit the interaction you have with the difficult person. Withdraw from shared voluntary duties and choose projects and committees that don’t include him or her.
Involve the Superiors
Involving the superiors is the second-to-last resort. In the best case scenario, the boss can straighten out the issue for you. Unfortunately, this isn’t always the case. Sometimes, the situation becomes worse because the colleague resents you for getting him or her in trouble. Or, you might find that the boss sides with the culprit.
Find a New Job
The real last resort is quitting your job. You can either transfer to a different department within the same company or break ties altogether. You’ll have to weigh the cost of this decision. Is the problem significant enough to merit such drastic action? Will you enjoy another kind of work? Will you easily find another position? And if you do, how will you handle it if there are challenging people at the new workplace?
What are the best ways of dealing with difficult people at work? Will you confront the problem directly by approaching the person to talk about their behavior? Will you let a supervisor know and let them handle the problem? Or will you flee to greener pastures by finding a new job? If you weigh the pros and cons of each strategy carefully, you’ll likely find a solution that works for you.
We’ve talked about the best ways to end an email; now let’s talk about beginnings.
You might wonder whether it’s really necessary to put much thought into how you begin your emails and other correspondence. If you’ve ever ignored a letter because it began with “To Whom It May Concern,” groaned because your name was misspelled, or wondered if the sender was human or canine because their greeting was so overly enthusiastic, then you know that getting your email salutation right is a big deal. In job search emails, for example, using the wrong greeting could make you seem less competent and even cost you an interview.
Here are the six best ways to begin an email, followed by six you should avoid at all costs.
In all but the most formal settings, this email greeting is the clear winner. It’s simple, friendly, and direct. If you want a slightly more formal tone, consider replacing hi with hello.
Although dear can come across as stuffy, it’s appropriate for formal emails. Use it when you’re addressing a person in a position of respect (e.g., Dear Lieutenant Smith) and in formal business missives such as a résumé cover letter.
Dear Ms. Roberts:
If the recipient’s gender is unknown, or their name is the least bit ambiguous, use a full name instead:
Dear Terry Jones:
Avoid honorifics that imply marital status such as “Mrs.” Use “Ms.” instead.
There are a couple of useful alternatives when you don’t know your recipient’s name or you’re writing to a general email inbox, such as feedback@[company].com. Greetings is one of them. But we also like . . .
The advantage of Hi there is that it works well if you’re sending a mass email or using a mail merge feature with customized name fields. You can set up your fields like this:
Hi [Name],
That way, when you use “there” in the [Name] field, your recipient will see a non-specific greeting: “Hi there.”
This one bridges the gap between the breezy hi and the more formal dear. It’s used less often, though, so be aware that it might stand out, and don’t use it if you want your greeting to be unobtrusive.
If you’re addressing a group of people, this is the way to go. We prefer it to more abrupt greetings like “All,” or the too gender-specific “Gentlemen” or “Ladies.”
Don’t misspell your recipient’s name. Ever.
Double-check the spelling of the person’s name and either get it right or omit it and use a generic greeting like Hi there. Although a nonspecific greeting may come off as impersonal, a misspelled name is a red flag that says you’re careless.
Have you ever read and responded to a letter that greeted you with Dear Sir or Madam? We’re going to go ahead and guess you haven’t. Not only is this salutation stiff and formal, it shows that you couldn’t be bothered to look up a contact name and address someone specific.
The same sentiments that apply to Dear Sir or Madam apply here. If your letter opens with To Whom It May Concern, we’re probably going to assume it doesn’t concern us.
Reserve this one for your friends and close colleagues. Otherwise, hey is glaringly informal and can even come across as disrespectful. Have you ever felt warmly greeted by someone saying, “Hey, you!”?
If you’re a golden retriever, you might be able to get away with a greeting this exuberant. Otherwise, you’ll come across as trying too hard. Forget the cutesy greetings, or at least save them for the most informal correspondence between you and your close friends.
If you’ve done your research and discovered that your recipient’s name is Michael McTavish, don’t assume familiarity and shorten his name to Mike. However, if he signs his reply with Mike, it’s okay to address him that way in the future. In fact, he might find it a bit peculiar if you decide to stick with the more formal moniker.
You are battling toward the nexus in a 5v5-ranked game late on a Wednesday night. You have to work the next day and know you are not going to get enough sleep. But fear not! Your dedication to League of Legends is helping more than just your online rep. It’s helping you to be a better team player by teaching you these five valuable lessons in communicating under pressure.
If your team gets thrown a lot of projects each day at work, you have to quickly prioritize your tasks and assess how your team’s skills align. When you understand each other’s strengths and abilities, new challenges are easier for your team to tackle. In League of Legends, you get matched with random players in solo queue. You then have a couple of minutes to pull an all-star team together. In real life, as in League of Legends, you often have to work with what you are given. You don’t always get your first pick in a project, nor are all people easy to get along with. So you have to figure out how to help fill the gaps on your team without sacrificing your skills.
Getting ready for a team fight? Attack Baron? Clear enemy jungle? Kill Teemo? In the Summoner’s Rift, you are constantly aligning your team around the most immediate and impactful objectives. If one teammate is missing or not on board, it could cost you the fight or, worse, the game. In a fast-paced work environment, your team needs to work together effectively. Playing League of Legends has taught you to understand what your objective is and to be clear about what it will take to complete it.
You are working late on a project that’s due tomorrow. Your colleague realizes he made a mistake that will keep you in the office longer. Option 1: ignite a pillar of flaming anger in your conference room with a snarky “GG noob,” dividing your team and setting yourself up for an even longer night. Option 2: take the mistake into account and refocus your team around the objective. If LoL has taught you anything, it’s that not sweating the small stuff under pressure can make the difference between victory or defeat.
If you are trying to get out of the Bronze league, you have to know what it means to build an adc, stack mr, and go backdoor. Knowing the lingo saves time and makes you sound competent. In the office, you might Slack your colleague, “Hey Chad, what’s the ROI on the FB account for tomorrow’s Q1 meeting?” Just as in online gaming, every company has a list of acronyms they use around the office daily. Being able to speak that common language helps everyone get on the same page quickly.
Not all of your projects are going to be a success. You fail, and you learn. However, it’s important to know when to call it. League players understand that if a team has lost their top, mid, and bottom lane on the Rift, defeat is predictable and it’s time to call “gg.” You can beat your head against the wall and drag your team with you, hoping for something to change, or you can take your losses and analyze them so you know what to do differently in the next match.
You might not benefit from putting “Diamond League Player” on your résumé, but you can be confident that League has taught you l33t team communication skills you can apply IRL. So, when you’re on your third cup of coffee and your boss asks you why you’re so tired, tell her that you stayed up late working on effective communication strategies. Or . . . maybe not. Just grab that caffeinated beverage and buckle up for the day!
No job candidate is perfect. Everyone has their flaws. Fortunately, employers aren’t looking for perfect people, just the right people.
Honesty is always the best policy during a job interview, but that doesn’t mean you have to put your weaknesses on display. Whether it’s your resume or your personal challenges that might raise red flags with a hiring manager, addressing your weaknesses and framing them in a positive way can help you avoid making excuses or sounding defensive.
Even if your resume is a little less than ideal, you can put a positive spin on some of the most common trouble spots employers are likely to question.
Lack of experience sets up a frustrating paradox—employers want to hire people with experience, but in order to gain that experience, you have to find an employer who’ll give a person without any a chance. What to do?
Remember that everybody starts somewhere, and hiring managers interview inexperienced candidates all the time. When you’re still growing in your career, there’s one positive quality you can emphasize to help you win over a potential employer—enthusiasm for learning. Show the employer that not only are you able to learn, but you’re excited by the possibilities.
RELATED: 4 Must-see Ways to Improve Your LinkedIn Profile
It’s not enough to say that you pick things up quickly, however. Everyone says that. Emphasize real-life examples of your ability to learn and adapt. If you’ve made a point to take extra classes, earn certifications, or even pursue new and interesting hobbies for the love of learning new things, take a moment to point them out. Ditto if you’re making a career change and you can point out skills from your previous job that show you’re quick on your feet.
Demonstrating that you’re a good cultural fit is also important. Skills can be trained, but finding the right personality match is much trickier for employers. Even the most qualified candidate isn’t likely to work out if she doesn’t fit in with the company’s overall vibe. If you’ve done your homework, you’ll have a good sense of the ideals the company embodies. Drawing attention to how well you’ll fit in can take the spotlight off your lack of experience.
Don’t kid yourself—hiring managers are going to notice those gaps on your resume, so you’ll need to address them.
Although honesty is the best policy, there are ways to turn things around so they don’t look so troublesome. If you struggled to find a new position after a layoff, for instance, you could say that you took your time trying to ensure that your next employer was a good fit. If you took a break to raise small children, care for a family member, or even broaden your horizons by traveling, don’t be afraid to say so. You’ll come off as more genuine and sympathetic than you would if you tried to sweep those things under the rug.
If you’re able to show that you did productive things with your downtime, such as taking classes or doing volunteer work, make sure you note them. It’s important to demonstrate that your resume gap was a period of personal and professional growth and not just a time when you allowed yourself to sleep in late and binge-watch Netflix in your pajamas all day.
In a Robert Half survey, HR managers said that having more than five jobs over a ten-year period is just too much job hopping. If you’ve made frequent job changes, be prepared to explain them.
Although moving between jobs every few years is more common these days, especially among younger workers, too many job hops in a short span of time can raise red flags. Are you never satisfied? Difficult to work with? Do you lack follow-through and commitment? The hiring manager will wonder, and it’s your responsibility to enlighten him.
Hiring managers are looking for reassurance that the company won’t go through the expense and effort of onboarding and training you only to have you leave in six months. Start by explaining why you made each career move, and be prepared to tell the hiring manager how it helped you advance your career. Be honest, but keep it positive. (Don’t say “I hated that job”, say “I felt I needed to move on to find a better fit for my skills”.) If you left because the job bored you, say that you were “looking for more of a challenge.”
Rather than getting defensive about your frequent job changes, focus instead on what you learned from each one. Be sure to play up the transferable skills you gained along the way.
Even if the interview process has revealed a few personal challenges—perhaps through the dreaded “What’s your greatest weakness” interview question—there are ways to spin them as positives.
Employers don’t want to hire people who nitpick every little thing and make life difficult. No one wants to work with that person. Instead, say that you’re thorough and you have high standards for yourself and your own work. It’s best to leave the word “perfectionist” out of your interview altogether, even if you identify yourself as one. The Muse explains why.
Shyness can be misconstrued as awkwardness or social ineptitude. Hopefully, through your interview, you’ve been able to demonstrate your ability to “people.” But, if you can’t help but let your shyness show, frame it as a “reflective nature.” Explain that you get very focused when you’re at work.
Sci-fi author Douglas Adams said, “I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.” Unfortunately, hiring managers aren’t going to view missed deadlines as a positive. If you take a while to accomplish things, don’t lie and sell yourself as someone who’s always prompt. Instead, emphasize your attention to detail and your belief that each task deserves enough time to be done right.
Whatever you do, don’t make excuses for your weaknesses. A job interview isn’t a time to defend yourself, it’s a time to present yourself in a positive way that shows why you’re the best candidate. To get more job offers, make sure to focus on your potential.
Last year, Grammarly polled our social audiences to see if they supported gender-neutral pronoun usage. The results were a bit surprising: more than half of the audience polled felt that the idea of gender-neutral pronouns was a nonstarter.
With this knowledge, I’d like to make an appeal to our audience: consider the singular they. Language has changed a lot in the last year, with the singular they being voted the most important word of the year, and numerous dictionaries adding gender-neutral usage notes. Merriam-Webster even introduced the gender-neutral honorific Mx. to their unabridged dictionary this year, forever ending the question of what to call someone whose gender is nonbinary (i.e., not male or female).
It’s about time we talked about they in particular and gender-neutral pronouns as a whole, and it’s time we discussed why they’re important to binary and nonbinary folks alike.
Since it’s Pride Month, we’d like to start by defining a few key terms in this discussion, with some help from our friends at the Gay, Lesbian, & Straight Education Network (GLSEN). Here are four gender-related terms that you should know:
Gender: A set of cultural identities, expressions, and roles—traditionally categorized as feminine or masculine—that are assigned to people based on the interpretation of their bodies, and more specifically, their sexual and reproductive anatomy. Since gender is a social construction, it is possible for people to reject or modify the assignments given to them and develop something that feels truer and more just to themselves.
Gender binary: A socially constructed system of viewing gender as male or female, in which no other possibilities for gender are believed to exist. The gender binary is inaccurate because it does not take into account the diversity of gender identities and gender expressions among all people. The gender binary is oppressive to anyone who does not conform to dominant societal gender norms.
Nonbinary: Adjective describing a person who identifies as neither male nor female.
Of course, these three terms are just the beginning of a discussion about gender, but for the purposes of talking about gender-neutral or third-gender pronouns, they’re a great start. If you have more questions about gender or sexuality, I’d highly recommend GLSEN’s resources on the subject.
Now, to return to pronouns . . .
One of the great lies about the English language is that it remains static. Grammar pedants and trolls generally operate under a series of assumptions about language, which may or may not reflect current usage and accepted norms. In the linguistics community, there is actually a term for this view of language—prescriptivism.
Unfortunately for prescriptivists, English is constantly changing—and always has been. Some words that grammar pedants scoff at as obnoxious neologisms were in fact coined as long ago as the nineteenth century. Take “dude” for example. Reviled by grammar trolls the world over, this term has provoked the ire of multiple generations of fuddy-duddies. But did you know that it has its roots in late nineteenth-century British dandyism? Although the term originally described a cultural trend in England, it eventually came to mean “clueless city-dweller” to American cowboys and ranchers (as Mental Floss notes, this is also the origin of the “dude ranch”). However, by WWI, “dude” had flip-flopped again to its current meaning—a cool guy.
Even if we adhere to certain rules to make communication easier for people across regions, dialects, and levels of writing proficiency, the language will eventually evolve. The singular they is simply another way English is changing for the shorter, the more empathetic, the better. As we’ve mentioned before, the singular they is not even a new phenomenon. Merriam-Webster includes usage examples of the singular they dating back to Shakespeare, with notable additions from the likes of Jane Austen and even the traditionalist W. H. Auden. The singular they is nothing new, but in making our language more inclusive of people of a myriad of genders, this simple word is becoming more and more important.
According to a 2013 GLSEN study, more than 64.5 percent of lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and queer students hear homophobic remarks at school. Of these students, 33.1 percent have heard harassing remarks specifically targeting transgender students. For transgender, genderqueer, genderfluid, and other nonbinary students, this can have extreme consequences, from lower GPAs to missed classes to suicide.
Clearly, language matters, and it’s especially important to people whose gender does not match cultural assumptions. That’s why we support and respect the use of whichever personal gender pronouns a person or group may choose to describe themselves. What’s a personal gender pronoun, you ask? GLSEN defines personal gender pronouns (PGPs for short) as “The pronoun or set of pronouns that a person would like to be called by when their proper name is not being used.” For people who identify as male or female, this is generally he or she, but trans, nonbinary, or gender nonconforming folks may use a variety of pronouns. They could use the singular gender-neutral “they,” but they could also use one of these options:
Although we won’t touch on all the pronoun options listed here, you can see that there are many. So how do you know which one to use? Ask! Asking someone their personal gender pronoun is easy. Just say something like “What pronouns do you use?” or “Is this pronoun right for you?” Most people will be happy to inform or correct you, especially when you ask them early on in your relationship.
Since we’re focusing on the singular gender-neutral they here, it’s important to note that many people at different points of the gender spectrum use “they.” When you’re using it in a sentence, you can say something like this:
“They is a talented artist. I really enjoyed their painting of a flower in art class yesterday.”
Now that we’ve talked briefly about how to use they for people who have chosen it as their PGP, let’s talk about how it can help people who identify as he or she. Merriam-Webster sums up the situation well in their usage note for they:
They, their, them, themselves: English lacks a common-gender third person singular pronoun that can be used to refer to indefinite pronouns (as everyone, anyone, someone).
Although English has many great qualities, it’s never been great with indefinite pronouns. Traditionally, he was the default pronoun for a person whose gender you didn’t know, as in this quote from Thomas Huxley:
“Suppose the life and fortune of every one of us would depend on his winning or losing a game of chess.”— Thomas Huxley
But, as many have pointed out, gendering all unknown people as male is sexist and inaccurate. That’s why Merriam-Webster, the Oxford English Dictionary, and the American Heritage Dictionary have recently added notes supporting the use of the singular they for a person whose gender you don’t know. “The trend, then, is clear. Writers who choose to use they with a singular antecedent should rest assured that they are in good company—even if a fair number of traditionalists still wince at the usage,” says the American Heritage Dictionary, in their usage note on the subject.
Admittedly, using the singular they in a formal context may still cause some raised eyebrows, so be careful if you’re submitting a paper to a particularly traditional teacher or professor. But the tides are turning, and English will soon be more efficient because of usages like this:
If Sally or George got a cold, I would have sympathy for them.
Note that, if we did not use the singular they, that sentence would read:
If Sally or George got a cold, I would have sympathy for him.
Or, if we tried to make some awkward amalgam of current language norms, we might write:
If Sally or George got a cold, I would have sympathy for him/her.
Furthermore, if Sally or George identified as a gender other than male or female, even the above Frankenstein-ed sentence would be incorrect. After all, your name does not determine your gender or your preferred gender pronouns.
There must be a better way!
Luckily, using the singular they makes English a more efficient language, and it helps us to avoid awkward sentence constructions. More importantly, though, it allows you to avoid making assumptions about the gender of a person you don’t know.
Of course, not everyone will agree that it’s time to formally accept the singular gender-neutral they. GLSEN’s research reminds us that people who would use they as their preferred gender pronoun have long been the subjects of harassment and discrimination, although things are changing. Grammarly supports the individual choice of pronouns and is using the hashtag #theyisok this week to start a dialogue about PGPs, gender neutral pronouns, and the singular they.
What do you think about the gender-neutral use of they? Leave a comment below, or tweet your experience with personal gender pronouns.
In 1855, Walt Whitman described his reaction to a person in pain in his poem “Song of Myself.”
I do not ask a wounded person how he feels, I myself become the wounded person, My hurt turns livid upon me as I lean on a cane and observe.
What did the poet mean when he said that he would “become the wounded person?” Would his transformation be an example of empathy or sympathy? What’s the difference between empathy and sympathy? The words are easy to confuse. They are both derived from Greek, and the spelling only differs by a couple of letters. It’s almost as if they were made to be used as synonyms. But they weren’t.
Of the two words, empathy is the more recent entry into the English language. Sympathy was in use for almost 300 years before empathy’s first written record in the nineteenth century. You might notice that both words contain -pathy, and that’s what makes them sort of similar – they share the same Greek root word pathos, which means “feelings” or “emotion,” but also “suffering” or “calamity.” But while both words deal with emotions, they are still very far from being synonyms.
Sympathy derives from Greek words meaning “with feeling.” The word is most commonly used to describe the way we share someone else’s feelings, especially feelings of sorrow or trouble. Hence, greeting cards given to mourning families are called sympathy cards. Sympathy can also refer to the sense of harmony between people with the same tastes, disposition, or opinions. When a person feels sympathy toward a cause or an organization, he has feelings of approval, loyalty, or support.
The Greek phrase that lends empathy its meaning is “passion from feelings or emotion.” Most people know empathy has to do with understanding and sharing the experiences, feelings, and emotions of another person. However, empathy can also refer to using imagination to ascribe your feelings or attitudes to an object, such as a painting or a natural object.
Which quality was Whitman illustrating in his poem? Empathy. By becoming “the wounded person,” he vicariously experiences their suffering. Is it possible to completely understand how someone else feels? Most people have to content themselves with feeling sympathy—the quality of caring about someone’s misfortunes or the feeling of emotional or intellectual accord with another individual. Neil deGrasse Tyson proposes that since “humans aren’t as good as we should be in our capacity to empathize with feelings and thoughts of others . . . maybe part of our formal education should be training in empathy. Imagine how different the world would be if, in fact, [we learned] ‘reading, writing, arithmetic, empathy.’” But if you finished your schooling, maybe these examples might help you understand the difference between sympathy and empathy: A Canadian woman has criticised a “disgusting” sympathy card sent by two “ambulance chasing” estate agents offering their services following the death of her mother. —The Telegraph
So I have to say that my sympathy for Tyrone would be fairly limited. —The Irish Times
From an evolutionary standpoint, empathy is a valuable impulse that helps humans survive in groups. —The Atlantic
People with a higher level of empathy learn to help others more quickly than their more hard-hearted peers, scientists say. —The Guardian
Adjectives are words that modify nouns. They are often called “describing words” because they give us further details about a noun, such as what it looks like (the white horse), how many there are (the three boys) or which one it is (the last house). Adjectives do not modify verbs or other adjectives.
Most often, adjectives are easy to identify in a sentence because they fall right before the nouns they modify.
In these sentences, old, white, lush, green, three, handsome, and last are all adjectives; they give us a more detailed description of the nouns they modify. An adjective might answer the mental questions, “What kind is it?” (as with an old clock, a white horse, the lush grass, the green grass, or the handsome boys), “How many are there?” (as with the three boys), or “Which one is it?” (as with the last house). Adjectives that answer the first question are descriptive adjectives. Those that answer the other two questions are limiting adjectives—they restrict or quantify a noun rather than describing it.
The examples above use the limiting adjectives five (how many ladies?), every (which year/s?), those (which flowers?), that (which table?), best (which piece?) and her (whose mother?). Technically, definite articles (the) and indefinite articles (a/an) also function as limiting adjectives.
Although many adjectives fall before the nouns they modify, as in the examples above, those used in sentences or clauses with linking verbs fall after the nouns they modify. Linking verbs describe a state of being rather than an action; the most common linking verb is to be, and others include sense verbs like appear, seem, look, smell, sound, and taste.
With linking verbs, adjectives like fatigued, delicious, golden, and spicy all fall after the nouns they modify (Cynthia, muffins, sunrise, spaghetti sauce).
You know you need to work, but you really don’t want to. Millions of distractions—some worthier than others—compete for your time and attention. How do you drown out the voice of procrastination?
Here are four ways that will get you working again, even when you’d rather be doing anything else.
1 Reward Yourself
In Key of Knowledge, prolific author Nora Roberts writes: “There’s no reward without work, no victory without effort, no battle won without risk.” The converse is also true. Why work without a reward? Why put forth effort without a purpose? Likely, your job has some intrinsic value. Of Nora Robert’s 200 published novels, most of them fall into the suspense or romance genres. Thousands of people use her stories to escape from reality, to relax, or to entertain themselves. How does your job help the world? How does it benefit you personally? When you are typing a document at work, do you think about how the task will ultimately fund your child’s college education, for example? With a little thought, you can likely find that your job adds value to your life in various ways.
According to ASuccessfulWoman.com, you may do your job because of “the desire to control [your] financial destiny, the need for autonomy, or perhaps the belief that [your] service or product will potentially enhance the current marketplace.” Why stop there? The same website encourages you to create your own rewards for a job well done. You’ll be motivated to work harder if you know something good will come at the end of it.
2 Make It Fun
Do you enjoy things more when you are alone or with friends? If you like solitude, why not get to the office early on your first days back? The office will be quiet, and you will have time to get yourself organized before your day starts. Tidy up your desk and make a list of what you want to accomplish. Then, you can either work in silence or listen to some tunes before your coworkers start stopping by.
If you’re a social butterfly, invite your colleagues to join you. You can work together in a shared space or flex your collective imaginations in a brainstorming session. Be honest, though, about whether your friends will disrupt your productivity. If you think they will, schedule a group lunch or go out for drinks after work.
3 Ease Yourself In
In video games, the lowest level is usually the easiest one. As you advance, you gain experience and the challenges increase. When you return from a break, you can’t always expect to pick up exactly where you left off. Instead, look at your to-do list. Are there a few important tasks that you can quickly or easily get out of the way? Clearing away these tasks can free your mind from worry so you can concentrate on the difficult work. Besides, marking even short, simple tasks as “complete” will make you feel a sense of accomplishment.
Do all your assignments seem equally overwhelming? Find out why. Are you afraid of failure? Do you feel incompetent? Do you have all the knowledge necessary to be successful? MindBodyGreen suggests addressing the source of your resistance, and “leaning in” like a surfer: “Just like surfing a big wave — once you’re in it, there are only two choices — either lean in, make the drop, and do your best to surf the wave, or wipe out miserably. You might wipe out either way — but . . . “Let’s do this!” . . . feels more empowering than “Oh no!””
4 Make It Doable
If you focus on everything you have to do, you might start to feel stressed. Instead, break large projects into small chunks. You can organize your time into chunks. For example, you might set a timer and commit to working for fifteen minutes. When the alarm sounds, briefly turn your attention to something less demanding, such as answering an email or filing documents. After a few minutes, restart the timer and do it all again. You’ll be surprised how much you can accomplish in fifteen-minute intervals.
Not all tasks lend to chunking by time. Instead, try the step-by-step method. Consider whether you have to complete the steps of the task in order. Would it be more efficient to juggle the sections around and compile everything at the end? For a writing project, for instance, perhaps you want to print out a copy before you proofread. Some writers claim to catch more errors on paper than on a computer screen.
Regardless of how you organize your tasks, don’t forget to include brief breaks from intense activity. Using this method, you will find yourself on the last step before you know it.
Every task presents unique challenges, so it might help to do a little research about how you can get over a slump in your particular profession. To illustrate, writers can research how to overcome writer’s block and build some of the methods learned into their to-do list.
Do you have work to do right now? If you were reading this article as a form of procrastination, it’s time to put it away and put your nose to the grindstone. If you think of a reward and a way to make the task fun, break tasks down into small chunks, and start easy, it won’t even seem so bad. You can do it!
Getting to know others in your office by striking up small talk conversations is an anxiety-inducing social activity, coming in right behind team-building exercises like the trust fall and that relay thing where you have to race around with a raw egg on a spoon. That goes double for introverted or shy people. This course will provide the student with five no-fail tips for striking up a conversation and sample scripts to demonstrate good small talk in action.
About Your Instructor
Karen Hertzberg holds a Ph.D. in Awkward Social Interactions from The University of Introvert Life. She specialized in Hiding in a Corner and Social Activity Avoidance until she challenged herself to study Conversation and The Art of Peopling. She is now a member of several social groups, the members of which not only do not find her boring but seek her out for conversations.
Prerequisites
Students should begin this course with an understanding that their own thoughts can be self-fulfilling. If you approach small talk with fear and trepidation, worried that you’ll be boring, you just well might be.
You should understand that you’re a worthy person with interesting things to say. Keep in mind that, particularly at office social functions, other people could well be in the same situation you are—just looking for someone to chat with. They’ll welcome you making an effort to get to know them by striking up a conversation.
1 Be interested.
If you want to be interesting, be interested. Dale Carnegie (author of the classic How to Win Friends and Influence People) said it, as have other experts in the social arts over the years. The first and most important step toward making great conversation is to show a genuine interest in the people you’re chatting with. Let curiosity lead the way!
2 Ask questions and follow-up questions.
Your questions don’t have to dive deep in order to make great small talk. You can start simply by saying something like, “How was your weekend?” or “Are you enjoying the party?” Really listen to the answer, and then ask meaningful follow-up questions that show you were paying attention. If the person you’re chatting with says that their weekend was quiet, for example, you can say, “We all need that from time to time! What do you like to do in your downtime?”
3 Be present and watch your body language.
As Dolly Parton’s character in the movie Steel Magnolias cheerily suggested, “Smile! It increases your face value.” Uncross your arms. Don’t look over your shoulder as though you’re planning your exit. And, whatever you do, hands off your smartphone.
4 Find ways to relate.
While you don’t want to monopolize the conversation, you also shouldn’t make the other person do all the talking. Find some things you can relate to from time to time, and inject your own observations and experiences. After adding some brief commentary of your own (see step 5), be sure to ask another question to lead the conversation forward. If the other person mentions that they like hiking, you might answer, “Oh, me too! I hiked part of the Pacific Crest Trail last year and it was amazing. I usually stick closer to home, though. Where do you usually hike?”
5 Consider the twenty second rule.
Dr. Mark Goulston, author of Just Listen, recommends speaking for no more than twenty seconds at a time. Think of conversation as a traffic signal. In the first twenty seconds, you have a green light—the person you’re chatting with is engaged and enjoying the conversation. But if you go beyond twenty seconds, you’ve got a yellow light. Caution! You’re edging toward boring. At the forty second mark, you’ve officially become too chatty or self-absorbed—red light!
Need some inspiration for your next small talk social challenge? The Muse put together forty-eight fun questions to consider asking. Need more small talk examples? Here are some scripts to help you get a better understanding of the process.
When the other person doesn’t have much to say
Be prepared to add some details from your own life before moving on to your next question to keep the conversation from sounding like an interrogation.
“Where are you from?”
“Boston.”
“Ah, I visited Boston a few years back. Great city! I wasn’t a big fan of driving there, though. Next time I’ll take cabs instead of renting a car. Did you like living there?”
“Yeah, it was great.”
“What do you miss most about it?”
When you want to deepen the conversation
Introverts tend to do better in conversations that go deeper than talking about the weather. Ask questions that will challenge the other person to give a thoughtful response.
“What do you do?”
“I’m a writer for the email marketing team.”
“Interesting! What sorts of things do you write?”
“I write some ad copy, but mostly I work on the company newsletter.”
“So, how did you become a writer? When did you discover your talent for words?”
When things get awkward
Sometimes conversations take a turn for the awkward. If that happens, acknowledge the awkward thing the other person said to let them know they’ve been heard, and then move on to another topic.
“Are you enjoying the party?”
“Not really. My girlfriend broke up with me earlier today.”
“Wow, break-ups are rough. I’m sorry to hear it. Have you lived in Los Angeles long?”
When you need to make an exit
It’s okay to bail if the conversation is going nowhere, just do it gracefully. Summarize the last thing the person said to you, then excuse yourself.
“It’s pretty amazing that you’ve trained your cats to reenact scenes from your favorite sci-fi movies. Sounds like you’ve found your niche. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to go make a phone call. Enjoy the party!”
Making small talk doesn’t have to be anxiety-provoking or tedious. When you worry less about whether you’re being interesting and, instead, show an active interest in others, you become more likable. Think of social interactions not as performing but exploring.
You’ve worked to make your email clear, and you’ve carefully edited to streamline your writing. The body of your email might well be perfect, but it can all go awry if you use the wrong sign-off. It’s just a word or a short phrase, followed by your signature, and yet finding the right tone to close your email often requires a surprising amount of thought and finesse.
When you’re struggling with how to end an email, it’s best to consider the context. What works for a friend or close colleague won’t work in a strictly professional correspondence with a distant acquaintance or someone you’ve never met before. Here’s a rundown of some of the most common email settings and the tried-and-true sign-offs that work best for each.
1. Regards
Yes, it’s a bit stodgy, but it works in professional emails precisely because there’s nothing unexpected or remarkable about it.
2. Sincerely
Are you writing a cover letter? Sincerely conveys the right tone for formal correspondence. Keep in mind that it’s likely to come off as stuffy in more casual business emails.
3. Best wishes
A good blend of friendliness and formality makes this sign-off a safe bet, but be aware of its greeting-card vibe and use it only when it fits well with the tone of your email.
4. Cheers
A recent study by the email app Boomerang rated cheers as the most likely sign-off (that isn’t a thank-you) to get an email response. It works well if your email is friendly and conversational but, unless you’re actually British or Australian, it may come off as affected in more formal settings. Cheers, mate!
5. Best
Best conveys best wishes in a cheerful, pithy way. If you get a lot of email, you know that nearly everyone uses this sign-off. That familiarity makes it seamless in the same way that regards is seamless in more formal emails. The downside is that it can be safe and dull, especially if you want your message to be dynamic and attention-getting.
6. As ever
This is a fine choice for people you’ve built an ongoing working relationship with. It reassures your contact that things are as good between you as they’ve ever been.
7. Thanks in advance
According to the Boomerang study, emails that include thanks in advance have the highest response rate. Maybe it’s because this sign-off expresses gratitude but also sets an expectation—you’re saying that you’ll be grateful when (not if) the person you’re emailing comes through. In more formal circumstances, thanking someone in advance may come across as too demanding, so take care where you use it.
8. Thanks
A simple thanks is also a solid choice when you want to express gratitude. But, just like thanks in advance, it can convey a tone of expectancy. Save it for when you actually mean to imply, “I expect you to do this.”
9. I appreciate your [help, input, feedback, etc.]
There’s never really a wrong time to express appreciation when someone has helped you out.
1. Love
I have a friend who once accidentally signed an office email to his entire department with love. He never lived it down. Save this one for family, close friends, and your significant other. The same applies to hugs or XOXO.
2. Thx or Rgrds
You’re not thirteen, and this isn’t a conversation happening in a messaging app. Use your words.
3. Take care
On the surface, take care sounds pleasant, but on closer examination, it seems to imply that the recipient should be wary of potential dangers. Use this only if bears are known to lurk by the Dumpster outside the recipient’s office. (We’re only half kidding!)
4. Looking forward to hearing from you
This one also sounds nice at first, but it’s ultimately passive-aggressive. Your recipient is likely to hear an implied “You’d better write back.”
5. Yours truly
Do you really, truly belong to the recipient? Nope. This sounds insincere and hokey . . . unless you’re writing a letter home to your parents from summer camp.
6. Respectfully / Respectfully yours
This one’s okay if you’re sending a formal missive to the POTUS, but it’s too formal for anything else. In fact, according to Business Insider, respectfully yours is the standard close for addressing government officials and clergy.
7. [Nothing at all]
We live in a world where people frequently email from mobile devices, so excluding a signature certainly isn’t a no-no as an email chain progresses, particularly if your recipient also drops the more formal sign-off. But not signing an initial email or using only the formal signature you’ve created to append to your outgoing emails comes off as impersonal. (Bloomberg disagrees, stating that email has become more like instant messaging than true correspondence these days, but we’re sticking to our convictions.)
8. -[Name] or -[Initial]
While this sort of sign-off may work for very brief, informal emails, it’s too cold and detached for most, particularly when you’re connecting with the recipient for the first time.
9. Have a blessed day
It’s best to keep anything with religious overtones out of your professional correspondence, although this one’s fine if you’re emailing an acquaintance about what you’re bringing to the church potluck.
Although this sign-off tends to happen more by default when the sender forgets to add an actual signature, we thought it was worth mentioning the ubiquitous . . .
Sent from my iPhone
This may be the most common sign-off of them all. It has merits, of course. It explains away brevity and typos—who’s at their best when typing on a phone? But it also conveys that you don’t care enough to do away with the default email signature that came stock with your device’s email app.
Some people get creative with this signature. A few fun (if not necessarily business appropriate) examples found round the Internet include:
And, for the Stephen King fans among our readers:
What’s your favorite email sign-off? Do you have a quirky or effective signature you’d like to share? Let us know in the comments.
We use the expression “there’s no room for mistakes” when we want to underline the importance of doing something correctly. But still, as you probably know from experience, mistakes appear whether there’s room for them or not. When they turn up in your business reports, memos, business emails and letters, and job applications, it can be downright embarrassing. We’ve gathered the biggest and most embarrassing, potentially devastating, and sometimes sneaky mistakes people make in business writing.
1 Using i.e. and e.g. Interchangeably
I.e. and e.g. might look similar. They even have somewhat similar meanings. But they are not the same, and they shouldn’t be used interchangeably. I.e. is an abbreviation of “id est,” which translates from Latin as “that is,” and e.g. is an abbreviation of “exempli gratia,” which translates as “for example.” Use i.e. to expand or explain something you’ve already introduced. Use e.g. to introduce an incomplete list of examples for something you mentioned earlier in the sentence.
2 Writing with an Improper Level of Formality
Different industries and different types of businesses are accustomed to different levels of formality in written communication. For example, if you were to write a business letter to a partner in a law firm or a big corporation, you’d be well advised to use a very formal business writing style—use a colon after greeting and follow all the other conventions of formal business letters. On the other hand, a CEO of a startup, even if it’s a very successful startup, might not mind if you start a business letter with “Dude!” Okay, that might be an exaggeration, but things like emoticons have no place in traditional business writing, even though they might be okay in industries that are more open to informality. When in doubt, err on the side of formal.
3 Overusing Exclamation Points
There are some things that you should never do with exclamation points in business writing. You shouldn’t write three of them in a row, even if you want to make sure your point really gets across. You shouldn’t write three of them in the same paragraph either, because that has to be one exclamatious (not a real word) email you’re writing if there’s such a need to exclaim. Generally, you can use actual words to express excitement, disbelief, surprise, or whatever you are tempted to use the exclamation points for. Save them for those really important occasions when you really need them, or when you want to express enthusiasm in the greeting or closing of a letter.
4 Problems with Clarity
“Problems with clarity” is an umbrella term we’ll use here for a whole bunch of mistakes people make that affect the clarity of their business writing. Mistakes such as writing too much in the passive voice, overuse of prepositional phrases, and confusing pronouns can all lead to problems with clarity. Overly complex sentences kill clarity. In business writing, it’s often best to keep it as short and informative as you possibly can. Exceptions exist, as they always do, but the rule of thumb is to never use two words when one will do, and never use complicated language when you can say it in plain English.
5 Bad Timing
You can craft a perfectly worded email, chock full of well-explained and well-presented information, and you can proofread it over and over until there are no mistakes in grammar or spelling. But if you send it too late, the information might lose its relevance and then all the work you put into it won’t matter much. This is especially important when replying to business-related messages. With emails, the standard is to respond within twenty-four hours; for written correspondence, it’s five days. If it takes you longer than that, the person waiting for your reply can become worried, frustrated, angry, insulted, or simply uninterested in what you have to say.
When you’re speaking out loud, homophones sound alike, but when you’re writing them out, it’s a different story. Though they have the same pronunciation, homophones may have slightly different spellings and totally different definitions. Since using the wrong one can completely change the meaning of your statement, it’s important to make sure you have the right word in mind. Here are seven homophone mistakes to avoid.
Than vs. Then
Despite their single letter of difference, misusing “than” and “then” can change a statement completely. “Than” is the word to use in a comparative statement, such as “You’re a better writer today than you were yesterday.” Use “then” when describing a sequence of events, like “Write a good sentence, and then compose a great paragraph.”
To vs. Too
While “to” and “too” sound the same, remember that the former is a preposition, while the latter is an adverb. “To” typically means “toward,” while “too” can either mean “excessively” or “also.” For example, you could say, “When you go to the beach, take me too.”
Your vs. You’re
Though it’s a common mistake, using the wrong version of this word can make your writing look sloppy. “Your” is always a possessive pronoun, so when you use this word, be sure you’re declaring ownership. For instance, you could say, “your book” or “your professional writing sample.” “You’re,” on the other hand, is a contraction of the words “you” and “are.” When using this word, check yourself by reading it with the words “you are” in place of the contraction to make sure it makes sense.
Threw vs. Through
“Threw” and “through” may be different parts of speech, but they can be tough to keep straight. The first word in this homophone pair is the past tense of the verb “throw,” or the act of tossing something in the air. “Through,” however, is a preposition that indicates movement across space or time. You could say, for instance, “The pitcher threw the baseball through the air like a pro.”
Stationary vs. Stationery
Many writers confuse these homophones, since the only spelling difference is a single vowel toward the end of the word. “Stationary” and “stationery,” however, have very different meanings. “Stationary” refers to standing still, while “stationery” refers to cards, paper, or other writing materials. Your stationery may be stationary, but never the other way around.
Seas vs. Sees vs. Seize
As if two homophones weren’t enough, you will find three spellings of this sound-alike. “Seas” is a noun that describes oceans and other large bodies of water, while the verb “sees” refers to looking or observing. Finally, “seize” means to take possession of something. “She sees the opposing forces seize the seas” demonstrates the unique meaning of all three.
There vs. Their vs. They’re
You’ll also find three of these tricky homophones. “There” refers to a general location or distance. When describing where you parked your car, for instance, you might say, “My car is in the parking lot over there.” “Their” serves as a possessive form for more than one person. When referring to the vehicles belonging to a group of people, for example, you would say, “their cars.”
Finally, “they’re” is a contraction of the words “they” and “are.” Whenever you use this term, make sure that what you really mean is “they are.” For instance, you could say, “They’re parking.” If you’re really ready to show off your knowledge of homophones, try out the statement “They’re parking their car in that lot over there.”
Homophones may sound the same, but their meanings are very different when you use them in writing. Study up on which words you need to use (and when to use them) because many spelling and grammar checkers cannot correct words that are spelled correctly but used in the wrong context. (Lucky for you, Grammarly can!)
What’s your biggest homophone mistake?
At any given time, everyone is trying to break at least one bad habit.
Bad habits sap our confidence, time, and energy and keep us from living our healthiest, most productive, and happiest lives.
Whether you want to eat better, improve teamwork skills, quit smoking, listen more, or something else, we’ve compiled some best practices that will have you breaking bad habits for good.
I’ll be straight with you—jumping into this whole-hog is a recipe for disaster. Human brains are primitively hard-wired to seek rewards, which makes changing habits time-consuming and difficult.
If you’re going to do this, do it right.
Stop thinking of yourself as a practitioner of your particular bad habit. Marie Forleo recommends changing your inner dialogue from “I can’t” to “I don’t” as a powerful starting point.
On average, it takes sixty-six days to change a habit, and there is a lot of variance. It’s a commitment. Consequently, some experts recommend taking a month to reflect on a bad habit before making a change.
Itching to start? Do a test run. Drop the habit for a week, then review to iron out the kinks.
Make every step as simple as possible. Jenny C. Evans, author of The Resiliency rEvolution advises making changes so minute that they remain undetectable by the primitive brain and do not trigger a stress response. So, if you want to quit smoking, cut back how much you smoke daily instead of going cold turkey.
Make new habit-formation a team effort by involving friends—it’s easier and more motivating than going solo. Remain accountable to yourself by setting reminders. Trying to eat better? Set daily reminders to order a side salad instead of fries. If you need something more compelling, bet money on it with 21habit and have your investment keep you honest.
Avoiding relapse is impossible without self-control. Willpower is a muscle you can strengthen with simple tips, like changing your environment (the out-of-sight-out-of-mind approach) or creating an If-Then Plan.
Often you’re not only stopping a bad habit, but also trying to replace it with something better. The Simple List Method is ideal for this situation. Basically, list the behavior you want to see and a corresponding concrete action, e.g., Listen better → Don’t bring a phone to meetings.
Break the magical hold of a bad habit by focusing on why it’s awful. Being mindful is surprisingly good at helping you with that. Imagine practicing mindful smoking or mindful procrastination. It’s naturally unappealing—exactly what you’re after!
Whether you journal or keep a table of success like the Simple List Method, it’s important to track progress, reflect periodically, and find patterns. Analyzing your results helps you understand if you fall off the wagon on certain days or in certain contexts. This knowledge will inform your habit-breaking approach moving forward.
