5 Grammatically Questionable Tattoos

Ever make an embarrassing grammatical mistake that other people judged you for? Of course you have; we’ve all made grammatical errors at some point. Now, imagine being stuck with one of those mistakes for the rest of your life. Believe it or not, people get misspelled or grammatically incorrect tattoos more often than you could imagine. How hard is it to do a quick Google search before permanently writing your biggest mistake ever? (Pretty difficult, apparently.)

Take heed of the following embarrassingly incorrect tattoos, and save a friend from eternal shame.

Some Mistakes Are Just “to” Big

The confusion between “too” and “to” has, not surprisingly, been permanently expressed on the bodies of more people than you would expect. It’s essential to remember that “too” means to bring something to a higher degree, while “to” can be used for anything from expressing physical motion to expressing purpose or intention. Avoid the embarrassment of confusing the two similar words; your body deserves better.

Make Better Decisions “Then” Your Friends

Here are two more words that are often confused — “then” and “than.” This gripe is just as unforgiving as the previous one because one word refers to a sequential passage of time, while the other is used to compare subjects. Your “Better Then You” tattoo will serve as built-in irony for all those that see it, so be sure you understand the distinction between the two before branding your body.

“Your” Never Going to Forgive Yourself 

Perhaps one of the most prolific and annoying grammar mistakes known to man  — confusing “your” and “you’re” — makes its way onto the bodies of grammatically challenged people at an alarming rate. If you can’t see the irony in getting a “Your Special” tattoo, perhaps it’s time to read up on possessive mistakes you’ve been making all your life.

“You’re” is the contraction form of “you are,” which should have been used in the previous anecdote. “Your” is a possessive adjective that should be used to assign possession to someone. Knowing the difference between these two common words is essential for avoiding embarrassment.

Your Tattoo and “It’s” Message Speak Volumes

Like “your” and “you’re,” it seems many people are unaware of the difference between “its” and “it’s.” However, the apostrophe has a purpose and isn’t just there for its own sake — “it’s” is always the contraction form of “it is” or “it has.”

“Its” is a possessive determiner, and can be used in the first or second-person. The easiest way to remember which form to use is by knowing that “it’s” has an apostrophe to represent the letter that was removed from its two component words.

Terrible Tattoos Won’t Do You “No” Good

Double negatives are a sometimes overlooked area of grammar, as is evident in the number of tattoos that display them. Your “Don’t Never Give Up” tattoo has a few flaws in its message, which actually contradict your intentions. “Don’t” is the contraction form of “do not,” which “never” then cancels out, leaving your tattoo urging yourself and all those that see it to, indeed, give up. Beware of similar double negatives when choosing an inspiring phrase for your next tattoo, and make sure that you’re not contradicting your own intentions.

As these examples make clear, grammar errors are not exclusive to the digital and print spaces, but are often permanently etched onto human bodies. It’s essential to know you’re grammatically sound in your intentions before attempting to tattoo any inspirational quote on your body.

What’s the funniest grammar mistake that you’ve seen etched on another person’s body?

Why Self-Publish Instead of Using a Conventional Publisher

Guest Post by Richard McMunn from How2become.com

The world of book publishing has evolved over the past few decades so much so that a publishing expert 20 years ago would struggle to get an entry level job in today’s market with their skill set from that time. There are varying opinions in the industry on some pivotal elements but one thing is certain, the accessibility for individuals to self-publish is more open and transparent than it has ever been. The question that then remains is whether this is a good thing or not, and if so, who is it good for?

Cost

The first immediate benefit of self-publishing is the cost. The finance needed to print a book even before factoring marketing and distribution costs is an element that, in the past, would have stopped many publishing projects from even getting off the ground. In self-publishing online this factor is immediately removed along with all the type setting and other old fashioned pre-printing set up costs.

Looking further down the line, when an author chooses to self-publish, they can reap the added reward of lower commission costs from eventual profits. It is unfair to say that publishers and book distributors do not earn the fees that they take for their services but in a world where many of their functions can be self-managed, it is of great encouragement to authors of all kinds that they will take home a much larger percentage of the fruits of their work.

Ownership and control

This is an issue that only becomes relevant at the point that a manuscript goes from completed work to successful product. Nevertheless, the ongoing battle between publishers and authors over how a successful book should be followed up is ever present. Whether it be the nature and style of a sequel, the optioning rights for screen production or even the distribution in translated format to other countries, when an author has complete control and ownership of their work, they can be sure that financial pressure will not force them to do something they are not comfortable with.

Even before this issue becomes apparent, there is a very real element of control in the initial creative process. Once a book is commissioned in the traditional manner, authors are committed to adhering to and meeting the deadlines set by publishers. Works can be rushed, rewritten or even scrapped at the decision of the house that has financed the work. In self-publishing a writer is able to work at their own pace and is only pressured by their own self-motivated desire to complete.

The marketing process

Advertising is an expensive area in all commercial markets. Although a publishing house will often cover the cost of such a function, it will all eventually come out of the profits that a book generates. This is a difficult thing to accept, especially in the cases where there is no real evidence that larger spends on marketing have been directly influential in the increased circulation of a book.

When self-publishing, particularly through an online format like Amazon, an author is in complete control of where their work is promoted, how much is spent on marketing it, and perhaps of most pertinent importance, in what shape the marketing takes form. The notion of selling out to a concept that devalues a work simply to boost sales does not have to be swallowed when the writer is completely overseeing every decision along the way. Some may choose to take this step, but those who don’t want to, quite simply don’t have to.

The future

As the field of book publishing evolves at an increasingly quick rate, so too the expertise needed to be successful in the field changes. It is important to stay ahead of the game, or at least, to stay abreast with what is going on. Many experts and opinion makers are already talking about a day when self-publishing is the accepted norm over the use of a contracted publisher. It follows that there is immense benefit in getting a grip on this function now, before publishers become so few in number that the possibility of finding one who will accept a manuscript is unimaginably slim.

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Richard McMunn is a writer for How2become; a leading career and recruitment specialist for public sector careers. For the last 8 years How2become has helped numerous people prepare for and pass tough recruitment processes and assessment centres in order to secure their dream job. You can also connect with How2become on Google Plus.

Carmel vs. Caramel: Which Is Correct?

Generally, “caramel” is defined as a chewy, light-brown candy made from butter, sugar, and milk or cream. For example: I love eating caramels because they are soft and chewy. In contrast, “Carmel,” is used as a proper noun, and it is a popular beach town in California, known as Carmel-by-the-Sea.

Carmel and caramel are not different spellings of the same word. Caramel is the correct spelling if you’re talking about food or colors. Carmel is a misspelling when used in those contexts, but it is a word that can be used as a name for people or places.

For examples of the ways you can use caramel and Carmel correctly, read below.

Caramel and How to Use It

Caramel is a noun, and it can have one of the several meanings:

1 The sweet substance made by heating sugar or syrup until it turns brown, usually used as flavoring or coloring for food:

They are not the first bakers to note the affinity of caramel and chocolate, but by emphasizing the bitter, sweet and salty notes in both, they’ve made that rare thing: a perfectly balanced bite.

—National Post

2 A soft toffee made by melting butter and sugar:

Mr Willy Wonka can make marshmallows that taste of violets, and rich caramels that change colour every ten seconds as you suck them, and little feathery sweets that melt away deliciously the moment you put them between your lips.

—Roald Dahl, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory

3 The color of caramel, light brown:

The color brown was the theme of her outfit as she donned a caramel-colored leather purse and a brown scarf that she wrapped around her neck twice.

—The Daily Mail

If you want to say that you’re cooking sugar until it melts and turns into caramel, the verb you could use for the process is caramelize:

But roasting not only helps maintain at least a bit of their texture; it also allows the juices to caramelize and condense.

—The Seattle Times

You can also find caramelize spelled with an s and not a z, and that’s also correct—it’s just one of the ways British and American English are different:

Cooking the fish under the grill allows the miso paste to bubble and slightly caramelise, while the fish cooks evenly underneath.

—Irish Independent

Caramel has been in use in the English language for a while, but it’s not one of the words you could trace back to Old English. It entered the language during the eighteenth century from Spanish, via French. Today, it’s occasionally misspelled as carmel, likely because of the way it’s commonly pronounced.

Carmel and How to Use It

But even if carmel is a misspelling for the sweet stuff, it doesn’t mean it should never be used. On the contrary—Carmel is a popular name for cities and geographic formations:

Part of a proposed zoning ordinance in Carmel would require new buildings larger than 12,500 square feet to have at least two covered spots for bike parking and a shower for people who bike to work.

—IndyStar

The Carmel is a lovely little river. It isn’t very long but in its course it has everything a river should have.

—John Steinbeck, Cannery Row

Carmel can also be a person’s name:

With a passion for English, Carmel Bavington’s retirement did not last long at all.

—Suffolk Free Press

The Dark Side of Mother Goose

Murder, torture, mass death by plague…not exactly the stuff of children’s literature, right? Actually, if you read the rhymes of Mother Goose, it is. Most people don’t realize the macabre history of these innocuous-sounding rhymes, but dig beneath the surface, and you’ll find Mother Goose poetry is chock-full of gruesome imagery.

In fact, many of today’s nursery rhymes are sanitized versions of the grim originals. Back in the 1950s, a group of concerned citizens rallied to clean them up lest they terrify little children, a crusade similar to one today’s parents wage against violent video games.

If you doubt the dark side of good Mother Goose, check out the stories behind these rhymes.

Ring Around the Rosie

Children love to hold hands and chant this little rhyme, falling to the ground in a fit of giggles at the phrase, “Ashes, ashes, we all fall down!” What could be better than a ring of roses and a pocket full of posies? Actually, this rhyme reputedly refers to the bubonic plague that wiped out 20 percent of the population of London in less than a year. Ring of roses? The ugly rash that heralds the disease. Pocket full of posies? To disguise the smell of sickness. Ashes, ashes? Cremated bodies. Not such a cheery children’s rhyme after all.

Three Blind Mice

This cute little ditty seems bland enough, other than the somewhat disturbing imagery of a knife-wielding farmer’s wife hacking off a few rodent tails. In truth, this rhyme is about the bloody reign of England’s Queen Mary I, the fierce Catholic who spent much of her time on the throne executing Protestants. The three mice in this rhyme refer to Nicholas Ridley the Bishop of London, Hugh Latimer, and Archbishop Thomas Cranmer, who were burned at the stake for heresy. The blindness is a device referring to their refusal to see Catholicism as the true faith.

Mary Mary Quite Contrary

What could be more innocuous than a little agricultural advice? This sweet rhyme conjures up a garden full of blooms tended by smiling maidens surrounded by tinkling bells and cockle shells. In truth, however, this is another tribute to Bloody Mary and her murdering methods. Silver bells and cockle shells were medieval torture devices, and the garden is a metaphor for the fast-growing graveyards that accompanied her reign.

Jack and Jill Went Up the Hill

Reading this rhyme brings to mind a pair of laughing children merrily filling their buckets at the well and suffering a small slip as they skip down the hill. Actually, most theorists believe this rhyme is a reference to France’s King Louis XVI and his wife Marie-Antoinette, who were found guilty of treason and publicly beheaded by the guillotine.

London Bridge is Falling Down

On the surface, this utterly harmless little rhyme seems to be just another story set to a tune and turned into a playground game for children. The rhyme refers to the famous bridge of stone built by Henry II in the 1100s; no one is certain of the identity of “my fair lady.” However, the second verse is where things get gruesome. The line “Set a man to watch all night” refers to the practice of embedding living human beings into bridges and foundational walls to act as a guardian spirit. In the Oxford Dictionary of Nursery Rhymes, three bridges are cited where the bodies of adults or children were found embedded in the walls. For the record, there’s no evidence any human beings were used to build the London Bridge.

So you see, old Mother Goose wasn’t exactly the benign feathered scribe depicted in children’s books. There’s a sinister streak in her collection of kiddie poems.

5 Ways To Write Better Poems

Poetry is a strange medium. It’s both heavily critiqued and profoundly subjective. A poem can be as timeless as the best classical literature or it might only ever move one reader. When a format is so artistic and personal, it seems absurd to impose rules or suggest ways in which one poem is objectively better than another. Nonetheless, there are certain ways in which a poet can make her own work the best it can be, regardless of how it compares to the mainstream.

Write when you’re ready.

This advice may seem obvious, but too many poets worry first about writing a poem—any poem—rather than deciding on what they really want to say. Others may have a great central idea, but nothing else to follow it, so they end up filling in the gaps with stuffing. When inspiration is lacking, don’t try to force creativity. Work on peripheral things, expand your vocabulary, research something that interests you, and examine those old ideas you put aside. When the time is right to put pen to paper, you’ll know. By exercising patience, your work will come from inspiration rather than obligation.

Write what you know.

This is just as true for poets as it is for novel writers. The best poetry comes from the heart and soul, so examine what lies within your own. Experiences, both good and bad, are ideal fodder for inspiration and will give your words the ring of truth. Look through old photographs or diary entries and ask your friends and family about past events. Compare their perspectives or recollections to your own. Remember that nobody else has had a life quite like yours; what better subject matter for a unique poem?

Borrow from known techniques.

Poetry is personal and expressive, so you shouldn’t feel obliged to follow the classic literary techniques, no matter how boldly academics tout their importance. Having said that, they are useful as tools to help you develop your own style. Try a simple device like alliteration, wherein words are grouped together by their first letter to create a sound pattern, as in “The train tore along the track at a terrifying speed.” When read aloud, the consonant sound mirrors the clacking of the tracks, and the motion of the train becomes a little more real. There are plenty of classic poetic forms you can try, such as elegies and ballads, but never let them hem you in. The key is to consider how these techniques can help you, not to blindly follow them.

Remember the power of words.

Poetry tends toward the short form, especially when following a rhythm or meter that requires a set number of syllables. Expanding your vocabulary will make it easier to find one word that can do the job of three. Similarly, you can use literary devices to layer on additional meanings; with the right expression you can make your words say more than one thing. For example, hyperbole involves making outlandish exaggerations that paint a bold picture. Instead of “My father was very strong and supported the household,” try “My father could lift the whole house with one hand.”

Write for yourself.

You are not writing for the critics, or a publisher, or your readers. Poetry is written for the poet. Even when you do have adoring readers, or you choose to craft a piece as a gift or homage to another person, the spark that makes your poetry special is you! Readers follow writers because something about their talent appeals to them. Publishers look for unique points of view. Switch off the inner voice that tells you to follow certain rules or avoid certain subjects. There will always be people who don’t like your poems, but your poems can only be considered art if they remain true to your vision.

The Secret to Success? Many of Our Favorite Writers Also Worked as Librarians.

April 14 is National Library Workers’ Day. Given the literary nature of library work, it’s not surprising that some of our favorite authors were also librarians. Here’s a short list of writers who put in time between the stacks.

Lewis Carroll Before he began writing Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland, Lewis Carroll (whose real name was Charles Dodgson) worked as a librarian in England.

Jorge Luis Borges This Argentinian author had quite a successful career as a librarian. After working as a librarian for years, Borges served as the Director of the National Library of the Argentine Republic.

Madeleine L’Engle After the success of her Newbery Award-winning novel A Wrinkle in Time, author Madeleine L’Engle had a career as a librarian in New York City.

Marcel Proust Proust is famous for his novel In Search of Lost Time, but he also worked at the Bibliothèque Mazarine. The Bibliothèque Mazarine is the oldest public library in France.

Beverly Cleary Newbery Award-winning children’s book author Beverly Cleary also worked as a children’s librarian. Perhaps her experience putting books in the hands of eager readers helped her create some of her famous characters like Ramona Quimby and Henry Huggins.

Does what you read influence how you write?

The Grammarly team is growing quickly, which means that we’re writing a lot of job descriptions to help us recruit top talent. One recent job post stated: “Salary will be commensurate with experience.”

Commensurate . . . commensurate . . . commensurate . . .

Perhaps you know what that word means; you may even understand how to use it in the context of a sentence. However, if you are like me, you have no idea how to actually say it aloud.

(In case you’re interested, here’s how.)

My inability to pronounce the word “commensurate” is a great example of how reading has made me a better writer. By reading others’ written job descriptions, I’ve learned specific text structures and language that I am now able to transfer to my own writing.

Today is National Reading Day, an annual event encouraging children to read. Although Grammarly is focused on improving English writing globally, reading is a topic that is dear to our hearts. After all, reading and writing are inextricably entwined.

Research has found that when children read extensively they become better writers. Additionally, reading provides young people with prior knowledge that they can use in their stories. Even professional writers understand the importance of reading others’ work. Here are the favorite books of some of our favorite writers:

A Tree Grows in Brooklyn, by Betty Smith

“A Tree Grows in Brooklyn [. . .] the story of Francie Nolan struggling up in a tenement slum through the cracks in the pavement to reach the sun. It may be the best book I’ve ever read about poverty, parenthood, the immigrant experience, and just about everything else. My firstborn daughter is named Francie Nolan.”

—Jacquelyn Mitchard, author of The Deep End of the Ocean

The Music Room, by Dennis McFarland

“I love this book because it is a haunting, touching, and beautifully written story about a deeply flawed family. I also love it because it was put into my hands more than 20 years ago by a young woman who said to me: ‘You must read this book.’ Did I ask that young woman to marry me because of McFarland’s book? That might be overstating things. But sometimes when someone changes your life by handing you a great book, she might be there to change your life in other ways as well.”

—Garth Stein, author of The Art of Racing in the Rain

What do you think? Does what you read influence how you write?

Today, Grammarly is launching our 2^nd Annual Scholarship for Exceptional Writing, and we’re interested in your feedback.

For a chance to win a $1,000 scholarship, we’re inviting students to write a short essay responding to one of the questions below, and submit to scholarship@grammarly.com before February 24, 2014 at noon PT.

• How are reading and writing interconnected?
• How has reading improved the way you write?

Please see additional scholarship rules here. We’ll leave you with the thoughts of Robin Kimmerer: “With words at your disposal, you can see more clearly. Finding the words is another step in learning to see.”

Happy National Reading Day, writers.